Hexum was born in Englewood, New Jersey, in 1957 to Thorleif Andreas Hexum, a Norwegian immigrant, and Gretha Olivia (Paulsen) Hexum, a Minnesota-born American of Norwegian parentage. He and his elder brother Gunnar were raised in Tenafly by their mother after their parents divorced when Hexum was four.
After graduating from Tenafly High School, Hexum went on to Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland to study biomedical engineering, and soon transferred to Michigan State University in East Lansing. During that time, he worked as a radio disc jockey, played football for the Spartans in 1978, and acted in minor stage roles.
A few days after graduation, he moved to New York in 1980 to pursue his acting career. While working as an apartment cleaner, he met Bob LeMond of LeMond/Zetter Management, John Travolta's manager. LeMond saw great potential in Hexum.

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