Emery was born in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, the daughter of an aspiring actress from Charlottesville, Virginia and an advertising executive who worked in Valley Forge, Pennsylvania. She attended Hollins College, where she planned to study painting, but became interested in drama classes instead because "they were having way more fun." After graduation she studied at the Circle in the Square Theatre School for a year, then began to audition.
Emery moved to New York with her then-longtime boyfriend. They eventually broke up and she enrolled in the Circle in the Square two-year program. She moved to the East Village in 1982.
Emery's theatre credits include The Matchmaker, Dinner with Friends (1999), What the Butler Saw (2000), The Prime of Miss Jean Brodie (2006), Talley & Son, Burn This (1987), Rumors, Present Laughter, The Women (2001), Marvin's Room (1991), Abigail's Party (2005), and Relatively Speaking (2011). She has been nominated for the Drama Desk Award for Outstanding Featured Actress in a Play three times.

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